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Why I Dance Milonguero: 4 Compelling Reasons You Should Too!

by Ivica Anteski · February 6, 2024

Yes, milonguero! Just like those old milongueos from the Golden Age of tango… at least that’s my goal. Since my early months, I’ve been focused on developing repertoire and musicality, back then known as “tango salon” or just simply “tango,” but today referred to as “milonguero.”

Not only that, I try to dance in its simplest and purest form. If you see me on the dance floor doing more than three sequences, I’m often not quite happy with my dancing. I certainly know much more than that minimalist version I insist on, but I strongly believe that good dancing is not about what you’re doing – good dancing is about doing it well… And the more things you do, the less focused you are on what really matters – your partner.

Why do I do that? And should you also consider dancing milonguero and traveling to milonguero events? Will it be good for you? What will you gain? And does it worth it?

Everyone should get their own answers to these questions, but if you ask me, I will decisively answer “Hell yeah!!!”. If you want more elaborated answer, you’ll find it in this article.

1. Less is more indeed

“It’s like a finger pointing away to the moon. Don’t concentrate on the finger or you will miss all that heavenly glory,” said Bruce Lee, referring to the ancient Chinese wisdom.

In tango, our bodies and movements serve as this pointer. Focusing too much on them will make you miss the “heavenly glory” that lies deeper.

Focusing on complex sequences or perfect posture will make you miss the universe that your partner carries within them. Making hard acrobatic steps or choreographed figures will make you miss the joy of moving simply with the music.

Milonguero dancing is often criticized for being too simple – but when one says “simple,” they should be aware that it’s simple in movements, but very complex and rich in emotion and experience.

Social dancers are not professionals, nor performers. They don’t need special talents – they dance with what they know and how they know. Perfection is in simplicity.

Don’t forget that in your everyday language you don’t need a complex vocabulary to say beautiful things – it’s often the simplest words that are the most powerful.

Check, for example, how simply Beto dances in this video:

2. Meaningful and authentic

Let me be honest: I hate when people are acting. I don’t like fakeness, and I don’t like when people are trying to show something they’re not.

And that is one of the reasons I like milonguero. Since you don’t dance to captivate onlookers, nor try to be better than someone else – you can be yourself.

Dancing for an audience becomes a performance, acting, and pretense to leave an impression. Posturing is something I despise; I appreciate authenticity, even if it means dancing imperfectly. There’s a certain beauty in being your true self and an undeniable ugliness in being fake.

The old milongueros used to say that when you dance for the public, you kill your tango angel – I needed some time to understand the meaning of that, but I believe now I do.

Killing the Angel

3. Because it’s social, not a sport

I avoid going to big festivals, and I hate when they interrupt milongas and give an opportunity to stars to perform. It often happens after the performance that the dance floor becomes a battlefield. Dancers are being “motivated” to dance like their idols, and they forget that dancing socially is not a performance.

On top of that, dancers are often competitive, so they tend to show off. They make huge steps, complex sequences, and their dance becomes a physically demanding experience.

I firmly believe that social tango is and should be a social experience, not a sport. It should be elegant and easy, allowing dancers to focus on the true purpose of dancing—being social and connecting with new people.

  • Social dancers dance like nobody is watching.
  • It’s not important how good your moves are; if you make your partner feel bad, you’re a bad dancer.
  • Tango is not just a dance; it’s creating an experience.
  • There aren’t many ways to connect with people as deeply as when you move together with the music in the background in a tango embrace.

Your support goes a long way in sustaining the quality and frequency of the content on my blog. I appreciate every contribution, big or small, as much as you feel you gained value from this article.
From my heart to yours!
Ivica

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4. Solidarity, not competition

In my experience, the main difference between milonguero events and others is the solidarity among the dancers. Yes, there’s often competitiveness, but on the dance floor, we’re all together, and we’re all having a shared experience.

The most visible expression of this mindset is the musicality. Milonguero dancers tend to move in a smooth and predictable way, so others can give them space and not be interrupted by the “creativity” of the couple. A milonguero couple glides on the dance floor with elegance and simplicity, allowing the ronda to flow easily.

That also helps partners to relax and connect, instead of trying to predict or amaze with their moves or choreography.

I can’t think of a better example of this than the video created by Rick from Tango and Chaos in Buenos Aires. I leave it to your discretion to decide what’s what and who doesn’t belong here.

I consider milonguero as the essence of tango. Tango lives at milongas, not on the stage, and that’s why social dancing (milonguero) should avoid being influenced so much by stage performances. Tango is, before everything, a social interaction: considering it just as a dance takes away so much from its richness and its history.

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Teachers are useless…

by Ivica Anteski · June 8, 2023

They are…

…if you don’t ask the right questions.

Yes, no teacher can help you learn if you’re not curious and unable to ask what really matters. Pablo Picasso once said, “Computers are useless, they can only give you answers.” That holds true for tango teachers as well. However, that doesn’t mean that a tango student has no use for a teacher. It simply means that teachers can’t help you learn if you’re not asking meaningful questions.

A teacher can only show you the door; it’s up to you to open it and make your own journey.

You are your own best teacher!

While I was thinking about the best example to illustrate my point, many of my most curious students (who made me feel uncomfortable with their questions) came to mind. But later on, I found another example – myself!

I can tell you from firsthand experience that asking the right questions can take you a long way. Of course, you’ll need teachers and sources to provide you with answers, but you must first have the questions.

When I first started dancing, there were no tango schools in my town. We only had practicas where I learned from more experienced dancers and occasional workshops. I struggled for a long time until I decided to take responsibility for my own progress and start asking questions.

I started to read and watch interviews of old milongueros to understand their way of thinking about tango. That led me to, I believe, asking the right questions.

When you get to that point, the rest is easy. You find the right dancers and take private classes. You find the right teachers and visit their workshops.

You read, watch, experiment, practice… If the mind is well-prepared, the body knows.

1. Learn in your way

No two bodies move alike, and that’s the beauty of tango. Each dancer possesses their own set of intricacies and personal conditions. Remember, your teacher may not fully understand every nuance of your body. Therefore, it’s essential to ask questions and explore how to incorporate what you learn into your unique movement style. By embracing your individuality and seeking guidance tailored to your needs, you’ll be able to unlock your true potential.

2. Be curious

A great teacher can only do so much if you lack curiosity. For example, basics may seem repetitive if you don’t understand how important they are. I genuinely appreciate those who challenge and question my approach when they see no purpose in doing it. These curious students often learn at an accelerated pace, even pushing me to deepen my teaching methods and develop more effective approaches.

Hey, sorry to interrupt…

Do you like reading my articles? If you do please consider a small contribution to the existence of this blog.

I don’t sell a book or run ads: I share these articles for free. Unfortunately I also have to pay my bills, so if you see value in my work please consider a small donation/gratuity (the same way you tip your favorite bartender).
From my heart to yours!
Ivica

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3. Question authority

Remember, blindly following an authority figure is never a recipe for success. In tango, knowledge and approaches must withstand rigorous scrutiny to be considered valid. Well, that applies to everything in life…

Don’t conform simply because someone told you to dance in a specific way. Instead, foster a critical mindset, question assumptions, and seek a deeper understanding of what you’re led to learn and practice.

Tango is a solution to a problem: if you’re led to learn to perform, you will be unable to solve dancing on the crowded dance floor in a social context. That’s a problem.

4. Build self-confidence

Unanswered questions can create tension and anxiety, hindering your self-confidence on the dance floor. To truly feel in your comfort zone, you have to let go of your doubts and insecurities. Only true knowledge can help you be present in the moment and let go of distracting thoughts. This way, you’ll build a stronger connection with your partner and create magical experiences.

The art of asking!

First of all, be aware that when you enter the tango world, there are many unknown unknowns.
You first have to learn what it is that you don’t know! Do that by reading about tango history and learning about tango culture. You always have the right to ask questions, even those that seem stupid because those people who don’t ask stupid questions never become smart. But when you know the unknowns, your questions become smarter and more meaningful.

You should also observe and notice nuances. Ask why some things are done in one way and others differently. Ask how it will work on the crowded dance floor. Ask about how to use it without losing the connection and musicality.

Remember, learning how to ask the right questions is an ongoing process. As you continue your tango journey, your questions will evolve and become more nuanced. Be open to learning from different sources: it will pay you back with mastery and joy.

Killing the Angel

by Ivica Anteski · May 16, 2023

When your desire to show off and grab attention overtakes the need to connect with your partner, your dancing loses something. The tango experience is a delicate structure, and even the smallest change can alter everything.

I’ve been contemplating writing about the concept of the dying angel for quite some time, but it has always eluded me. I struggled to find the right words to describe it… Perhaps I needed time to bring it closer and gain clarity in my mind.

Dance like no one’s watching!

“When you perform, your tango angel dies” is a saying that was uttered by some of the old milongueros. I can’t recall where exactly I first encountered it, but I do remember it remained a puzzle that I couldn’t solve for a long time. What does it mean? How can a simple act of performing influence your dancing? Although I couldn’t fully grasp its true meaning, instinctively I sensed its profound wisdom.

The simple explanation is that when you dance solely for the onlookers in the milonga, your authenticity is compromised. Your dancing changes as you crave external validation. You forget about your partner, and the dance loses its soul. However, let’s delve into the subtleties and more obvious effects of performing.

1. Your repertoire changes

You cease to be yourself and express what’s inside you, instead “fishing” for attention. Every gaze from those who watch you steals a part of your soul. Showing off causes you to abandon your authentic story and employ movements to attract attention. Unaware of the process, you start forsaking your regular repertoire and reaching for more complex sequences stored on the upper shelves of your dance vocabulary.

2. You forget your partner

Your partner becomes a mere extension of your ego. You begin to see them as a limitation, particularly if their dancing level is lower than yours. They transform into a tool to enhance your own performance, no longer seen as a person or companion with whom you share emotions. The connection exists solely to execute steps and is no longer considered a goal in itself. If this is the case, one might question why it should even be considered tango, as dancing alone would yield the same result, albeit devoid of true partnership.

What many dancers are not aware of is that what they imagine is often far from what they are able to execute, resulting in them becoming a caricature of their own vision.

Hey, sorry to interrupt…

Do you like reading my articles? If you do please consider a small contribution to the existence of this blog.

I don’t sell a book or run ads: I share these articles for free. Unfortunately I also have to pay my bills, so if you see value in my work please consider a small donation/gratuity (the same way you tip your favorite bartender).
From my heart to yours!
Ivica

Thank you button

Securely processed via PayPal

3. You start listening to the music in a different way

It is no surprise that some dancers find subtle and intricate music boring. Have you noticed how some prefer to dance to music with explosive, exaggerated beats? When showmanship becomes the primary objective, you search for the “bang!” – the dramatic and hyperbolized elements that allow for extravagant moves. Drama and spectacle, often accompanied by overpowering singing, become the driving forces behind your dance style.

4. You disrespect the ronda

Social tango entails visiting the milonga and dancing on a crowded floor alongside your friends. It also means respecting them and their desire to have a good time dancing beside you. When showing off becomes your goal, the ronda and other couples suddenly become a nuisance. They bother you and limit your ability to create the grand spectacle you envision. Your ego distorts your perception of the ronda, rendering dancing in harmony within a confined space an inconvenience. The onlookers erase your ability to connect with other couples on the dance floor, and you forget the importance of collective enjoyment and solidarity.


I often advise my students to avoid watching YouTube videos of show dancing and idolizing performers. It’s a trap! Even if you’re aware that it’s merely a show and not meant to be replicated at milongas, it changes you. Because, as the saying goes, “Monkey see, monkey do!”

Not that I’m not guilty of killing my own tango angel countless times. When I step onto the dance floor, I often remind myself to forget about the people sitting around and watching me dance, and instead, focus on my partner and our joint flight to the tango clouds.

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