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The leader/follower confusion

by Ivica Anteski ·

The leader/follower confusion

The terms ‘leader’ and ‘follower’ are so much part of the tango vocabulary used today that I often see even some Argentinian teachers using them. In fact, most of the time when people use leader/follower, they learned them from their teachers, not because they came out with them because of how they feel them.

I avoid using them whenever I can. Although to some might look like logical choices, when you think about it, they are deeply misleading.

This article might be a reason for some disagreement, but hey, one shouldn’t I ran away from saying what he thinks is the right thing, even when his voice shakes. Anyway, I see this as part of my duty to write about it.

As I said, I name here my top four reasons you should avoid using ‘leader’ and ‘follower’ in tango. I tried to explain them in short and to support them broader explanation why I think that way.

I already wrote about why a man should follow the woman and why the woman should follow the man. As an addition to this, the third and fourth reasons are about the nature of their joint effort to achieve a perfect connection and enjoyment.

So, why should we avoid using ‘leader’ and ‘follower’ when we talk about tango?

1. Because the woman leads the emotion

It might seem like a patriarchal cliche, but please give it a chance, read it and then decide.

Tango is an emotional experience. Both, men and women, can enjoy the emotions in the dance equally, but they don’t contribute to creating this emotions in the same way.

The man can lead the emotion of course, but in the same time, he has many other things to do as well – the choreography, the navigation in the space, the musicality of the movements etc.

The woman in tango has a little different priorities list. First or very high on her list will be the emotion. She will focus on how she feels, how the partners makes her feel, how the music makes her feel, how the embrace makes her heart ticking.

All roads lead to her heart. Tango is created by men who wanted to get closer to a woman, so it’s a gift that he gives to her. Not the other way around.

She will focus on the communication, because without that she will not be able to receive the information in order for the dance to happen, but more important – she will do it because it feels good. If this “feeling good” stops, the channels will be closed. This makes the dance hard and uncomfortable.

The conclusion is that most of the things the woman does in the dance depends on how she feels about them. Woman in tango is not a receiver of the emotion, she is, rather, the creator, the active element – she gives the color to all that the couple does. She leads the emotion.

Hey, sorry to interrupt…

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Ivica

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2. Because the man follows her heart and her body

On the other hand, the mans part of the equation is receiving and nurturing that emotion. All the man does in the dance is to win her heart. The tango in its core is a game of seduction and it follows a similar rules as any other game of seduction.

Check out my post about how the tango is a game of seduction.

The dark side of tango

Historically, tango was created by men who wanted to win a heart of the woman. Buenos Aires in the beginning of 20 century was overpopulated – mostly by young men, poor and lonely. Some say that there was just one woman for every 10 men. They had only two ways to get a woman in their life: to pay for a prostitute or to win her with tango. Those historical circumstances shaped the way the tango is danced – they defined what will be the masculine and the feminine role. Check more about this in the reason number 4.

Having all this in mind, his role in tango has limited options – and non of them is connected with leading.

Of course, I am talking here about dancing with a smooth connection and subtlety, and not just some cardio or show off exercise that looks like tango (in that case he can ignore what and how she feels, but then he should expect her to close emotionally).

Guys, to dance tango, you must listen to the heart of the woman. – Cacho Dante (The Tango and Trapeze Acts)

His job is to make her body move together with the music, in an enjoyable way. He achieves this by giving subtle suggestions to her body, paying attention not to push her out of her comfort zone too much so she won’t become tensed. If woman in tango makes mistake, he will follow and cover her mistakes. In that case she won’t even notice the make.

His role means that he has to constantly watch how her heart and body reacts to his suggestions, to adjust, to avoid what makes her tense and to create patterns she finds enjoyable. His job is to follow her.

3. Because tango is about giving

One of the most important aspects of the couple in tango embrace is that there is a constant flow of information and energy between the partners. This means that they both contribute to what’s going on – in their own (different) way.

Some beginners tend to compete with their partner, sometimes even blaming them for the mistake. This comes from having a wrong mindset – a dancer should understand the tango embrace as a cooperation, a joint journey to accomplish what some call a perfect tanda.

If you are not a beginner who is still focused on himself/herself, not giving all you have is selfish dancing. In my experience this is usually not something that is learned in tango – it’s often part of the character.

When you dance tango you must give everything. If you can’t do that do not dance. – Ricardo Vidort

Tango is a process in which both partners must give, but in the same time they must be open to receive as well… And for sure is’t not just leading or just following.

4. Because the magic is in the polarity

What I want to point out here is something which deserves more space, and I will probably write again on this topic. Here I just want to give you a short note of the idea, as one of the reasons why I avoid using the leader/follower terminology.

What’s so magical about tango is that it makes a man feel more masculine and a woman more feminine. Their roles in tango are opening possibilities for discovery of their core.

I’m talking metaphorically here, but there is a great deal of truth beyond the metaphor. I often like to use another metaphor: that there’s no tango without testosterone and estrogen. Tango, as life itself, doesn’t accept them mixed up – it needs them polarized.

The more polarized – the better.

In our society the difference between the masculine and the feminine energy is often blurred. Some people are often afraid to express the true nature of their core. Men are less men and women are less women. Tango helps them to regain their natural role, at least for a short period of time on the dance floor. This short insights in time can trigger transformations of peoples lives, as they discover how the feeling of being a more masculine man makes them more centered or being a more feminine woman makes them feel happier.

Using the leader/follower terminology takes away the opportunity to underline what the partners in reality do: men expressing their masculinity and women expressing their femininity.

To support my all four points I will finish this article with a quote from a very dear book. It’s a long one, but it’s worth taking the time to read it all.

The English-speaking Tango community generally uses the terms ‘leader’ and ‘follower’ to describe those roles, because they are not gender specific. These terms do not come to us from Tango, but from the Ballroom community, and they can be taken to imply a hierarchical relationship, with the ‘leader’ having higher status than the ‘follower’. The vocabulary used by the dancers of the Golden Age implied no such value judgment.

Often when a man who had learned to dance in the practicas asked me to lead him, he would say that he would dance the woman’s role, and I would dance the man’s. (…)

In describing what the leader does, dancers of the Golden Age often used the verb llevar, a verb which has a number of possible translations, including to carry, to take, or to wear – a very different idea from the one implied by the verb ‘to lead’ (…)

In describing what the follower does, a number of different verbs were used. One was to allow (dejar) oneself to be carried (llevada). Another was acompañar – to accompany.

But acompañar was also used to describe what the leader was doing, especially when discussing turning steps. This represents a fundamental truth about the relationship between the leader and follower as understood by the dancers in the Golden Age. To lead was in fact to follow the follower. This paradox lies at the heart of the choreographic freedom enjoyed by Tango dancers in the Golden Age. It is by following that the leader gets the power to carry the follower wherever the leader wishes.

– Christine Denniston, “The Meaning of Tango: The History and Steps of the Argentinian Dance”

As I already said, I do expect disagreements on this topic. If you’re one of those who disagrees, don’t hesitate to write comment or sent me a message.

If you agree, you can share it with your tango friends, so they can also re-think how they use leader/follower terminology.

The principles of danceability

by Ivica Anteski ·

The principles of danceability

Have you ever started a dance and soon discovered that it is quite undanceable tanda? Some dancers in this situation interrupt the dance and ask their partner to dance the next one. To be honest I don’t like this kind of behavior since it’s a sign that dancers didn’t wait for the tanda to start before making the invitation. They gambled and lost.

But what the DJ can do to help dancers avoid similar situations? How can (s)he differentiate between danceable from undanceable music? I’ll share my experience on what might be important. I believe there are some undeniable principles that should be respected when choosing music for your tandas.

Oh, how much I suffered when the vals was played in our local milongas. It was time for me to go to the bar and socialize – but never time for dancing.

“How come you don’t like a vals? It’s so beautiful, like a roller coaster ride”, she asked.

I didn’t know what to say. I didn’t knew the answer. I only knew that when I tried to dance vals I just could not step on the beat. For me it was undanceable music.

It was when I was dancing no more than two months. Later on, after I learned how to do it, I came to love it so much, that I couldn’t sit on my chair during a vals tanda. Sometimes I feel just like Tete in this video when he describes how he feels when he dances vals.

“The vals is an exceptional thing for me. The music gets me drunk… When I dance a vals I think I am flying. I dreamed that I danced on a clouds with my companion and the planes passed and they looked at me… I dreamed that the planes stopped to look at me…”

Tete Rusconi

🙂 Be serious. It’s not funny. For some people this is a real thing!

There are subjective and objective principles of the danceability of the music. The subjective are those that depends on the ones ability to dance to a specific style. It’s much more than asking the question do you like the music of a specific orchestra – most often this depends of the movements repertoire in the dancer’s toolbox. What you like or not, is often defined by your ability to dance to it.

If you can’t dance valses, like me when I was a beginner, of course you’ll love regular dos-por-cuatro tangos more. We love what’s easy and what suits us.

On the other hand, there are certain objective reasons why some tangos are undanceable. Those apply for everyone, no matter what’s their ability or aesthetic preference.

Those two can often converge – but even then, a good DJ or a good dancer should be able to differentiate them.

In the following four points I’ll try to describe the principles of danceability of the tango music, the way I understand them. Some might disagree, but they are tested and they worked perfectly for me and my students.

1. The intention of the orchestra

This is the most important thing. It’s also the most objective one. It relies on the history of tango music and its connection with the dance.

Saying that the most danceable music is created in the Golden Age of tango (1930-1950) is not just a stylistic choice. The music before and after that period was mainly created to be performed in concerts or radio (especially after). The Golden Age orchestras played their music for the dancers.

Before 1950s there were no strong amplifiers, so at the milongas there were no DJs – there were live orchestras. They watched how the crowd (it was not audience) danced, and the dance itself influenced the way they played. It was a dancing music.

After that period, for various reasons, Golden Age ended and there were no more milongas. Many orchestras continued their careers as a concert or radio musicians. What they created after that was still a kind of tango, but it was not meant to be a dancing music. Dancing was not their intention.

2. The predictability of the rhythmic patterns

Is the song arrangement predictable is also very objective principle of the danceability of the tango music. It relies on the internal structure and you can even ignore the historical context it was created in, and still determine its danceability.

Using this principle one might find some tracks from the Golden Age to be completely undanceable and others, which are not from this era, to be with a solid danceability. Why is so? Because even in the Golden Age there were musicians who performed for concerts or radio.

Let me give you an example. De Angelis “Pavadita” is recorded in 1958, which means it’s few years after the Golden Age ended. But it’s still danceable, even with changes it contains. The ending is little slower than the rest of the track, but it’s so predictable that I doubt it will confuse even a beginner. It’s created to be easy and predictable. It slows down, but you can unmistakably follow the beat and walk on it.

Hey, sorry to interrupt…

Do you like reading my articles? If you do please consider a small contribution to the existence of this blog.

I don’t sell a book or run ads: I share these articles for free. Unfortunately I also have to pay my bills, so if you see value in my work please consider a small donation/gratuity (the same way you tip your favorite bartender).
From my heart to yours!
Ivica

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3. The dominance of the singer

One of the characteristics of the tango music after the Golden Age is the dominance of the singer in the non-instrumentals. Sometimes it’s so strong that it’s impossible to hear the background, especially on the older tracks.

Not being able to hear other layers of the music is not the only problem. Sometimes the melody is tightly connected with the singers performance, so they even slow down or play faster in order to support him/her. Musicians in this type of music are not focused on dancers, they are playing for the star – and the star is the singer.

No wonder the music of Carlos Gardel is not played at milongas – his dominant role in the music leaves no space for dancing.

One can rarely find music with dominant vocalist, which is still danceable. One such example is Hector Varela with the powerful deep voice of Argentino Ladesma. Yet, even it’s danceable, sometimes it feels like the vocal is too powerful and some DJs usually hesitate to play this kind of music. This is specially noticeable in the milonguero world.

In my experience the DJ should also be careful when the orchestra have one musician who is so dominant that he outglows the rest. Let’s take for example Osmar Maderna and his powerful piano solos like the one in “Lluvia de estrellas”. The beat is predictable and clear, but the solo is so dominant that often confuses dancers, especially the beginners.

4. The popularity

A DJ should never forget why is (s)he there. The taste of dancers tends to go in the direction of the most danceable music.

First, the DJ should ask themselves would they dance to the music they play?

Second, the DJ should carefully observe what motivates dancers. Some people tend to skip some songs and go to the bar for a drink if the music is undanceable.

It’s god not to forget that in this situation the DJ has to pay attention only to experienced dancers with great musicality. Bad dancers ignore the music anyways and they will dance to whatever comes out the speakers. Even to some music which has no connection with tango.

Some beginners tend to ignore the music as well. They’re so much focused on their movements that sometimes completely ignore the music.

What do you think? Will these observations help DJ’s? If so, please share them with your tango friends.

The dark side of tango

by Ivica Anteski ·

The Dark Side of Tango

People often tend to close their eyes to the simple truth that tango is a dance of passion; and there’s a reason for that: they don’t want to see the dark side of tango.

There are some facts about the dance we love so much that people try to ignore because they make them uncomfortable. In fact, many of these are not good or bad, they just become such when we decide to see them as good or bad. It’s all about opinion.

“Can I ask you something? I need someone to talk to”, a private message came on my personal Facebook account.

It was almost 3 am, a quite late time to start a conversation with someone who is not very close to you. Earlier that night, after the milonga, he had fight with his girlfriend. He danced with another girl and she was jealous.

He needed someone to talk to. Someone more experienced… or, with more years living with tango.

“Can couples in tango persist? Do you know of any successful relationship in which both partners dance tango?”, he asked.

“Yes they can”, I answered without hesitation.

I asked myself the same question more than few times. There are no people in tango who did not ask themselves or someone else this question. Dancers feel it’s quite uncomfortable that “the tango is a game of seduction”.

Remember those videos of Osvaldo Zotto and Mora Godoy showing tango sequences? Here is how it starts – this is the first video:

In the very opening the narrator says:

“The tango as a dance is a game of seduction and like any game of seduction it begins in the eyes, in a glance and has very clear rules.”

Tango IS a game of seduction. Sometimes less, other times more – but historically and in reality, it is often something very similar to flirting. No one sane should deny that all sorts of chemistry is going on in the dancers bodies when they hug in so close proximity. It is just biology.

On the other hand, it doesn’t mean that it’s always about sensuality and sexual attraction. It’s often no more than just a pleasure of the dance… the music… the movements… It’s often just pure human connection that makes it so wonderful.

In any case – the elephant is in the room. It will not go away if you close your eyes: you should see the tango as it is, not as you want it to be.

There’s this myth that old milongueros were gentlemen, a sort of knights with royal manners. Not many people know that in the Golden Age being a milonguero was not an honorable thing; and for a lady who spent most of her time dancing tango with strangers they used other words.

It was also forbidden during the day to say hello to a person whom you know from milongas. Visiting milongas was not considered a good habit for respected people.

Well, luckily times have changed and today we have different criteria about what’s moral and respectful, but that thing in tango which made people moralize is still here.

So, let me try, with caution, to say few things about what is it that makes tango dangerous. What can make it romantic, sensual or even a sexual experience.

1. Tango is personal and intimate

Tango is personal in many ways. First of all, when you dance any dance, you express who you are. You open yourself and you show to the world who you are and what’s inside of you. You can learn about personality of a dancer just by the way they move.

Since there are no standards on how to move, this is even more obvious in social tango: the way people do things is very personal.

Second, when you dance – you open to the world. You are also open to the person you dance with. Tango is intimate: it can reveal your secrets and emotions you hide even from yourself. Watching people dance can sometimes tell you some things, but most of what’s going on is invisible. It’s only the partner that can feel it.

Your partner can sometimes help you open even more than you expected. This is one of the reasons why dancing with different people feels different. Some, even with poor technical skills or musicality, can feel very good – opposite to others with rich technical repertoire.

Tango is personal and it does matter who is your partner. Dancing is connecting with the soul of another human being, yes, but it’ll be delusional to believe that it does not matter if that someone in your embrace makes you feel more like a man/woman.

On the other side, saying that tango is personal and intimate, doesn’t necessarily mean that it’s always romantic. In today’s world we are alienated. We are rarely intimate with people out of romantic or sexual context. This is why many people feel the level of intimacy in tango to be something sexual or romantic.

2. Tango is a form, not a content

The dance is a medium. It’s a form of interacting with other people. It provides an environment, means and rules by which people can show what they feel and think.

The content we put in the dance depends on us. It can be love, friendship, romance, passion, or even hate… One can initiate something, the partner can add some more or ignore it, but it’s never one way. It takes two to tango!

If you put tango on trial for being passionate, dirty and promiscuous – your accusations are going to a wrong address. You cannot blame the gun for a murder. If you want to see passion, dirtiness and promiscuity, you should turn your eyes to the people that dance. They give the meaning and content to the dance. Tango becomes what it is because of the souls opening to each other – their content becomes the content of the dance.

Of course, every form is tightly connected to its content. Writers write novels to tell stories and poems to express subtle feelings. People use cards to invite on weddings and a telephone conversation to arrange meetings. And, of course – people dance salsa to have crazy night and tango to have passionate and warm embrace.

Tango becomes what it is only because of the dancers.

I had very passionate and sensual dances on fast D’Arienzos and very a-sensual or unromantic dances on Demares music. The form can influence the content, but it’s not what defines it. Dancers and what they have in their hearts decides what will be the content.

Hey, sorry to interrupt…

Do you like reading my articles? If you do please consider a small contribution to the existence of this blog.

I don’t sell a book or run ads: I share these articles for free. Unfortunately I also have to pay my bills, so if you see value in my work please consider a small donation/gratuity (the same way you tip your favorite bartender).
From my heart to yours!
Ivica

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3. Tango is a catalyst

Have people spend some time together isolated from the world and you’ll found out a lot about their compatibility.

Tango makes people open to each other. That makes interactions faster and smoother. Vast amount of information is being exchanged and this gives away what’s in your heart. It mostly happens unconsciously, under the radar.

This makes tango an ultimate catalyst. If you have just a seed of emotion, dancing tango with him/her can make it grow very fast. This happens with the positive emotions, but it also happens with negativity.

If, for example, you feel little uncomfortable around someone it can often grow and become very awkward or even hate. On the other hand, if you have warm feelings while dancing with someone your heart can easily fall in love.

Of course, human heart is not an automaton – it does not work by a simple algorithm. There are many other factors which influence this process. I just want to point out that dancers should be aware that tango makes some things develop much faster than other interactions.

4. Men and women have different perspective

When I wrote about the tango embrace I said that men and women have very different roles in tango. In a metaphorical way: men dance with their brains, women dance with their hearts. This of course, doesn’t mean that a man has no emotions and that a woman is brainless. It’s more connected to what they do: the man has to create the choreography to match the music, he has to navigate, to coordinate the movements with other couples; the woman has to focus on the connection and his lead, she has to make it easy for him to transfer the intention with lowering her defenses, and most of all, she often leads the emotion by motivating him and giving silent feedback.

Check out my post about the magic of tango embrace.

Embrace like a lover, dance like the wind

No wonder a man and a woman can have completely different opinion about how someone is dancing. It is because they are focused on different things.

More men will tell you that they dance with a lady because she is beautiful, than there will be women that will say she chose to dance with someone because he’s handsome.

Why is so? I believe because tango is danced for her heart. He dances to touch her heart… and, she dances for the same reason – because she feels good when her heart is being touched.

In fact tango was created for that purpose. At this point I’m wondering is there a social dance that is not connected in some way with the courtship ritual? We can see that even in the animal world.

When tango started in the turn of the century, there were 10 times more men than women in Buenos Aires. Men had to compete to dance with a woman. This is one of the reasons why the dance is created to please her heart, not his (at least not in direct way).

Knowing that women and men have different perspective can solve some disputes about what is sensual or romantic in tango, because some things which a man considers romantic or sensual, a woman might not, and vice versa.

5. The rules will not protect you

Codigos are made with awareness of the sensual and romantic nature of tango. Dancing the last tanda with your lover or life partner exists as a message to your environment.

There are also rules about the number of tandas danced with one partner. It’s considered inappropriate to dance too much with one partner, since it sends a message of romantic interest.

But, does it really?

Tango is just a form: the content is given by the dancers. This also means that the rules are just a form as well: you can use them, but they’re not a real indicator. One can dance just one tanda with a girl and they can still express romantic interest. One can dance the last tanda with his/her lover, but it can still happen to express interest in another.

Rules cannot change the human nature – they’re there just as a form of communication with the community. Of course, I support respecting the rules, but one has to be aware what they really mean.

So, after all this, can you tell is tango sensual and passionate, is it dirty and promiscuous?

I do not have a definite answer. Everyone has to find the answer for him/herself. All I can tell you is that it offers opportunity for people to express themselves.

Tango is what dancers make of it!

Do you have different opinion? I will be happy to hear about it – you can write it in the comments section bellow.